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" This elegantly written and useful book . . . describes how, for millennia, human beings have struggled to rein in desire." -USA Today

At a time when the fallout from reckless spending and unrestrained consumption is fueling a national malaise, Daniel Akst delivers a witty and comprehensive investigation of the central problem of our time: how to save ourselves from what we want. Temptation reminds us that while more calories, sex, and intoxicants are readily available than ever before, crucial social constraints have eroded, creating a world that sorely tests the limits of human willpower. Referencing history, literature, psychology, philosophy, and economics, Akst draws a vivid picture of the many-sided problem of desire-and delivers a blueprint for how we can steer shrewdly away from a campaign of self-destruction.

• Sales Rank: #641006 in Books
• Published on: 2011-12-27
• Released on: 2011-12-27
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 8.45" h x .70" w x 5.50" l, .60 pounds
• Binding: Paperback
• 320 pages

From Booklist
In a book full of startling facts, this might be the most startling: of the 2.5 million deaths in the U.S. annually, “something approaching half could be prevented . . . if people simply managed to lead healthier lives.” But this isn’t a book about living a healthier lifestyle. It’s an exploration of “the challenge of moderation in the face of freedom and affluence.” The weapons of mass consumption, Akst calls them, are everywhere. We eat too much food, spend too much money, have too much sex. It’s not that we lack willpower; rather, the temptations have vastly multiplied over the years. In the course of defining the reasons why self-control is becoming such a rare commodity, Akst examines our tendency to blame everything except ourselves, citing a woman he met who blamed excess weight on genetics, fast food, advertising, and high-fructose corn syrup—all while polishing off two plates of waffles and cream cheese. It is this kind of willful self-destruction, Akst concludes, that’s killing us in greater and greater numbers. A very thought-provoking and colorfully written book. --David Pitt

Review
"You wouldn't be able to stop yourself from reading this book! Daniel Akst is among the sharpest, most perceptive writers of his generation, and he is in fine form in We Have Met the Enemy."
-Gregg Easterbrook, author of Sonic Boom

"This book entertains even as it pokes at our most sensitive spots. Daniel Akst handles the touchiest heretical ideas with charm, humor and painless scholarship. With no ax to grind, no cause to serve but reason he opens up the foregone conclusions by which we live and leaves a reader with new and alternate views of ourselves and others. Like the finest essayists Akst makes the deepest ideas fascinating and fun to read."
-Nicholas von Hoffman

"The more a society progresses, the bigger a problem self-control turns out to be. If you wish to be ahead of the curve for understanding America's problems, Dan Akst's excellent and informative book is the place to start."
-Tyler Cowen, Professor of Economics, George Mason University, and co-creator of the blog The Marginal Revolution

About the Author
A native New Yorker, Daniel Akst is a well-known journalist who has worked at the LA Times and Wall Street Journal and now writes a monthly column in the Sunday New York Times. He also writes regularly for the Wall Street Journal culture pages, and has appeared in many other publications, including American Heritage, the Boston Globe, the Christian Science Monitor, Civilization, Technology Review, the Washington Monthly, and on both public radio and television. His first book, Wonder Boy (Scribners), chronicled the eye-popping ZZZZ Best fraud perpetrated by teenage entrepreneur Barry Minkow, and was named one of the 10 best of 1990 by Business Week. He is also the author of The Webster Chronicle published by BlueHen in October 2001.

Akst is a graduate of the University of Pennsylvania who spent 13 years in Los Angeles before moving to the Hudson Valley, where he lives with his wife and two sons.

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64 of 69 people found the following review helpful.
Pogo Would be Proud
By AdamSmythe
The Pogo comic strip, with its characters set in the Okefenokee Swamp, featured an uncommonly effective and entertaining mixture of sophisticated wit and humor that was enjoyed on different levels by a wide variety of readers over the years. Perhaps Pogo Possum's most well-known line was, "We have met the enemy, and he is us," from which this book sources its title. Appropriately so, I'd say, since the book deals with a number of serious/sophisticated issues, though sometimes in an irreverent way.

In Chapter 2 (out of 21 chapters covering about 275 pages) we're told that about one million Americans die prematurely each year due to behavioral risk factors such as smoking, drinking, being overweight, having high blood pressure and being physically inactive. If you think a lack of self-control is a contributing factor in these instances--as author Daniel Akst does--then maybe it's reasonable to spend some time thinking more in depth about the topic of self-control. In this vein, the book's subtitle, "Self-Control in an Age of Excess," should let you know what to expect.

Some of the author's points are reinforced with interesting examples from modern life. For example, perhaps you haven't heard of the LifeSeat 600. Well, that's a motorized toilet designed to smoothly raise a person of up to 600 pounds to a standing position. (The manufacturer is now working on a LifeSeat 750.) Or, did you know that studies of teenagers show that self-discipline is a better predictor of academic performance than IQ? Issues of self-control being as common as they are (ask Eliot Spitzer, John Edwards, Tiger Woods ... the list could--and does--go on), there is plenty of material for the book to draw upon.

The book does not read like a Puritan lecture, fortunately. Indeed, it acknowledges upfront that self-control is tougher when calorie-rich foods, the Internet, various casinos, and other potential temptations are so readily available nowadays in America. Further, the author addresses the notion that the greater liberties that most (though not all) people now enjoy can lead to greater problems of gambling, addiction, overeating, overspending, etc. Indeed, the subtitle to Chapter 1 ("Liberty is dangerous!" attributed to Albert Camus) succinctly makes that point. And, of course, we're constantly bombarded with advertising, such as, "Resist the temptation to resist the temptation!" (from an ad in a well-known magazine). Then there's the recent financial crisis--now there was another example of a lack of self-control and self-regulation. All told, as the author notes, "self-control has lost some of its traditional stature, at least compared to self-actualization." Think about that for a moment. And it's not all the fault of modern American society, either. The ancient Greeks (also discussed in the book) had their problems, too.

Summarizing, this well-written book seems intended to give support to the notion that a little self-mastery can improve the quality of your life, as well as its quantity. You certainly don't have to be a totally out-of-control individual to gain something from reading the book. Frankly, few of us are without some weaknesses that we'd like better to control. Basically, if the concept of self-control is something you'd like to explore further, then this book deserves your consideration.

26 of 27 people found the following review helpful.
Thought-Provoking, Wide-Ranging and Funny
By History Buff
I loved reading this book, for its insights, humor and masterful synthesis of material and ideas.

In "We Have Met the Enemy," Daniel Akst tackles some of the biggest questions of our times, questions that we're often afraid to ask because they require us to think about thorny issues like freedom, willpower, human nature, and how to make sense of many of our social ills: obesity, alcoholism, overspending, etc. The term "personal responsibility" has been hijacked by conservatives over the last few decades, and Akst's topic of self-control unavoidably wades deep into those waters. His politics appear to be an interesting combination of libertarian and liberal. Yet he eschews knee-jerk hysteria and political correctness and instead brings to the discussion a great deal of nuance, thoughtfulness and scientific evidence. He's grappled long and hard with how we as a society can balance freedom with the many temptations it brings.

Somehow he manages to address these issues with a sense of humor that often had me laughing out loud.

Along with the intellectual courage of his arguments, what impressed me most about Akst's book was his astonishing range of references. From Odysseus to 19th century European novelists to Gnarls Barkley, Akst seems to have a voracious appetite for high and low culture, and he weaves it all seamlessly into his writing. In the wrong hands, this might seem pretentious. In this author's hands, it seems totally natural and effortless. The book is a great read -- somehow completely accessible while being intellectually challenging. Highly recommended.

17 of 18 people found the following review helpful.
We Do Not Know How Unhappy We Are
By Jeffrey Swystun
Before I get into the purpose and content of Akst's book, let me first say how much I enjoyed his passion and his prose. This is a wonderfully written and timely rant (perhaps a bit overdue - we should have been on this pre-recession). Akst's thesis is the study of "the challenge of moderation in the face of freedom and affluence." It is a book that examines self-control and the challenge of willpower in a world where temptations have evolved and expanded beyond many's ability to manage.

As the author explains, "Yet while temptations have multiplied like fast food outlets in suburbia, the superstructure of external restraint that once helped check our impulses has been weakened by loosening social constraints, the inexorable march of technology, and the same powerfully subversive force - capitalism - that has given us the wherewithal to indulge." Do not fear, the book is not a socialist shout-out - Akst is just providing accurate context: "That we have the chance to get ourselves into so much trouble - with food, drink, money, and one another - is actually a testament to human progress, for what we're talking about here is nothing less than the democratization of temptation."

And we are doing a poor job in controlling ourselves. We are smoking, eating, boozing, and screwing with wild abandon. These activities now account for "more than a million fatalities annually in this country, or close to half of all U.S. deaths." We have a few other problems like conspicuous consumption, living beyond means, all the while filling landfills with discarded crap. Akst's metaphor of a giant buffet stocked with calories, credit, sex, intoxicants is apt and so is our inability to diet and choose wisely.

Some may say that the one flaw in the book is that Akst fails to provide a prescription. He does call for help from family, friends, colleagues and community but admittedly the issues are extensive and so intertwined that any roadmap would come across as a flakey self-help book and this is not that type of book. Its strength is presenting a strong argument for change and putting the onus on each individual reader to be the change they wish to see in the world (to paraphrase Ghandi). The book resonates, provokes thought, and is a call for changes that would have far-reaching benefits for individuals and society as a whole.

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hardcove

• Sales Rank: #2256155 in Books
• Published on: 2007-11
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Binding: Hardcover
• 541 pages

Most helpful customer reviews

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Disappointed
By Melba L. Mullings
The book was said to be in good condition, however upon receiving found that the first 4 chapters were falling off the spine of the book. After approx. one month/one day per week of usage, chapters 1 -4 have fell out of the book.

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
textbook
By aminevill
Did the job, too bad that the 8th edition just came out....resale value will suck.

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• Coaching Log—helps coaches record and critically analyze a coaching conversation
• Coaching Plan—used to develop the initial coaching plan and the action plans for achieving desired outcomes
• Framework for Reflective Questioning—helps coaches evaluate the entire coaching process, recognizing what worked and what could be done differently next time
• Transcripts of successful coaching in action

• Sales Rank: #52953 in Books
• Brand: Brand: Brookes Publishing
• Published on: 2011-02-14
• Released on: 2011-02-14
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 10.96" h x .48" w x 8.50" l, 1.20 pounds
• Binding: Paperback
• 240 pages

Features

• Used Book in Good Condition

Review
August 2011 --Review

About the Author

Dathan Rush is the Associate Director of the Family, Infant and Preschool Program (FIPP) at Western Carolina Center and a research associate at the Orelena Hawks Puckett Institute in Morganton, North Carolina. Prior to accepting his position at FIPP, Mr. Rush was a clinical assistant professor and personnel development consultant in the Lee Mitchener Tolbert Center for Developmental Disabilities at the University of Oklahoma Health Sciences Center in Oklahoma City. He served as Assistant Director of the Oklahoma SoonerStart Early Intervention Program at the State Department of Health from 1992 to 1999. He served as an editorial board member of the journal Infants and Young Children until 2002 and has published articles in the areas of in-service training, coaching, supporting children and families in natural learning environments, and teaming in early intervention. He is past president and former executive council member of the Oklahoma Speech-Language-Hearing Association. Mr. Rush has presented numerous workshops nationally on topics related to team building, use of a primary coach model of support, training of trainers, coaching, and provision of supports in natural environments.

M'Lisa L. Shelden, PT, Ph.D., is Director of the Family, Infant and Preschool Program (FIPP) at Western Carolina Center and an associate research scientist at the Orelena Hawks Puckett Institute in Morganton, North Carolina. Prior to accepting her appointment at FIPP, Dr. Shelden was an Assistant Professor in the Department of Rehabilitation Science at the University of Oklahoma Health Sciences Center. She is a graduate Fellow of the ZERO TO THREE: National Center for Infants, Toddlers, and Families, and she has also served the Section of Pediatrics of the American Physical Therapy Association. She is a member of the editorial board for the Journal of Early Intervention. Dr. Shelden has co-authored several articles related to early intervention teamwork and a chapter related to physical therapy personnel preparation. She presents nationally on topics related to transition, inclusion, coaching, evaluation and assessment, use of a primary coach model, and provision of supports in natural environments.

Excerpt. � Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.

Excerpted from Chapter 3 of The Early Childhood Coaching Handbook, by Dathan D. Rush, M.A., CCC-SLP, & M'Lisa L. Shelden, PT, Ph.D. Copyright� 2011 by Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.

What does it take to be an effective coach? Do specific characteristics exist that affect or predict an individual's ability to serve in the role of coach? How does a coach's personality influence his or her effectiveness? These are a few questions that might come to mind for a practitioner who is considering implementing a coaching style of interaction.

In her chapter "Talking to Families," P.J. McWilliam (2010) noted that there are many challenges to developing effective family-professional partnerships and that interpersonal factors play a substantial role in the quality of such relationships. In their seminal work, Dunst and Trivette (2009) researched characteristics of effective helpgiving that relate to the field of early childhood. These key principles must be employed in order to provide "help" that is indeed helpful and meaningful rather than being detrimental and creating dependency. In their text Using Skilled Dialogue to Transform Challenging Interactions, Barrera and Kramer (2009) provide valuable information on how two people who are very different from each other can effectively engage in a nonhierarchical and nonjudgmental partnership. This chapter is intended to compile the information from such sources in order to help both experienced and novice coaches develop a deeper understanding of what characterizes an effective coach and to promote self-reflection among coaches to ensure that they take a research-based approach to helpgiving.

FAMILY-CENTERED PRACTITIONERS

Understanding and implementing family-centered practices is a key principle in early childhood intervention (Brewer, McPherson, Magrab, & Hutchins, 1989; Hanson, Johnson, Jeppson, Thomas, & Hall, 1994; Johnson, 1990; McBride, Brotherson, Joanning, Whiddon, & Demmitt, 1993; Shelton, Jeppson, & Johnson, 1987; Shelton & Stepanek, 1994, 1995; Turnbull, Turbiville, & Turnbull, 2000; Workgroup on Principles and Practices in Natural Environments, 2007). Although key elements of family-centered care have been delineated, infusing the approach into the day-to-day implementation in early childhood systems, programs, and individual teacher and therapist practices is easier said than done.

At the core of the provision of family-centered care lies the premise that practitioners believe that all families are capable and competent. In addition, when a coach is using a family-centered approach, he or she enters into the process of developing a relationship with the family. The coach pays particular attention to "leveling the playing field" and supporting parents and other care providers, recognizing what they have to offer and contribute in the partnership. McWilliam (2010) provided a checklist for implementing principles of family-centered care by effectively communicating with families in ways that 1) create opportunities for informal dialogue, 2) acknowledge family strengths and competencies, 3) solicit parents' opinions and ideas, 4) seek understanding, 5) demonstrate caring for the entire family, and 6) acknowledge and respond to the feelings and emotions of the family.

When a coach is implementing family-centered care, his or her ability to effectively communicate with family members is an essential skill. Characteristics of an effective communicator include but are not limited to demonstrating attributes of being caring, empathetic, and engaging. Use of active listening and being mindful of and responsive to nonverbal communication also are behaviors and strategies that, when implemented, lead to expanded opportunities for nonhierarchical coach–coachee interactions (Burley-Allen, 1995). In the literature about family-centered practices, interpersonal qualities of practitioners are considered to be vital factors for promoting positive outcomes for families (Blue-Banning, Summers, Frankland, Nelson, & Beegle, 2004; Dunst & Trivette, 2009; McWilliam, Tocci, & Harbin, 1998; Park & Turnbull, 2003). Trust, honesty, respect, and behaviors that promote equitable relationships are repeatedly mentioned as characteristics of effective practitioners who are implementing family-centered care.

RELATIONAL AND PARTICIPATORY HELPGIVERS

As we mentioned in Chapter 2, over the past several decades, the work of Dunst and Trivette (see Dunst & Trivette, 2009, for summary and review) informs the field of early childhood intervention in many ways, but particularly important are their in-depth contributions related to effective helpgiving practices. Helpgiving that promotes positive outcomes for all family members and is family centered has two components: 1) relational helpgiving practices and 2) participatory helpgiving practices.

Relational helpgiving practices focus on the relationship between the helpgiver and the help receiver, particularly the help receiver's appraisal of the presumed beliefs of the helpgiver toward the help receiver. More specifically, relational helpgiving includes both helpgiver interpersonal skills with help receivers and the attitudes of the helpgiver about the help receiver's capability to become more competent. For example, consider a situation in which an early intervention coach is supporting a young, first-time mother and her newborn infant who was prenatally exposed to cocaine. If through his actions, comments, or behavior the coach appears to the mother to be negative or judgmental, their partnership will be compromised and the outcomes for that parent and child will probably not be optimized. Relational helpgiving practices include behaviors such as compassion, empathy, active listening, openness, honesty, and trustworthiness. The help receiver must feel supported and must know and believe that the helpgiver cares about him or her on a personal level, as well as caring about the outcomes for the help receiver and his or her family (Dunst & Trivette, 2009).

The second component of effective helpgiving practices is participatory helpgiving. Participatory helpgiving includes both choice and action on the part of the help receiver and responsiveness and flexibility on the part of the helpgiver. It emphasizes support of the action and participation of the help receiver and focuses on strengthening existing help receiver capabilities and promoting new help receiver competencies. Participatory helpgiving practices meaningfully involve help receivers in the choices and decisions that they make and the actions that they take to achieve their desired goals and outcomes. The focus of participatory helpgiving is to implement strategies that support the help receiver to attribute accomplishments, new skills and capabilities, and achievement of desired outcomes to his or her actions and decisions. Research indicates that in order for positive outcomes to be achieved, both relational and participatory helpgiving practices must be present (Dunst & Trivette, 2009).

Consider a practitioner who observes that one of the children she supports through home visiting does not have any nice toys. The coach is concerned about this situation. She knows that her program has an abundance of nice toys that are no longer used because they have stopped taking toy bags with them to home visits and instead use what children and families have readily available in their environments. The coach decides to give a few of the former toy bag toys to the family. On her next visit, the coach is surprised by the parent's reaction to her gift. The mother expresses thanks, but the coach notices that she becomes quiet and more withdrawn. Although the coach had good intentions, she violated a primary premise of effective helpgiving practices. Yes, the coach demonstrated relational helpgiving; a caring and generous attitude toward the child and family. She did not, however, implement participatory helpgiving practices in this situation. In addition, a significant finding in this area of research is that provision of supports in the absence of an identified family priority or need results in negative outcomes regarding the capacity of family members (Dunst & Trivette, 2009).

Consider an alternative response on the part of the coach that demonstrates both relational and participatory helpgiving practices. As the coach was getting to know the family, she began identifying the interests of the child. The mother mentioned that her young son loved a particular toy that they had seen at the grocery store, but indicated that she could not afford to buy it and that she felt bad about the situation. The coach then asked the mother how she might support her in feeling better about the situation. The mother responded eagerly that she was very interested in identifying some options for toys for her child. A discussion ensued between the coach and coachee about what the mother thought the child liked about particular toys at the store. They also explored past strategies that the mother had used to identify and obtain needed resources, such as shopping at yard sales, the thrift store, and the flea market. As the conversation continued, the mother considered additional options—for example, trading toys with a neighbor or family member and visiting the local library. Then she developed a plan for when and how she would accomplish her goal of obtaining toys for her child.

In the second version of the scenario, the coach demonstrated both relational and participatory helpgiving practices. She showed that she was listening to the parent and displayed care and concern for the mother's feelings and priorities. In addition, the coach engaged in participatory helpgiving practices by implementing a resource-based conversation that engaged the mother in identifying previous strategies, analyzing past successes, and developing a plan of action to achieve her desired outcome.

In light of the evidence about relational and participatory helpgiving practices, particularly with regard to empowerment of family members, practitioners must be aware of and develop skills which ensure that families know and believe the practitioners care about them. In addition, a practitioner must implement strategies and demonstrate behaviors that promote choice and action on the part of the coachee. The coach must support the coachee to readily attribute achievement of desired outcomes to his or her actions. Parents' attribution of the importance and success of their participation, decisions, and actions is a critical factor in building their own capacity to care for their children.

CHOOSING RELATIONSHIP OVER CONTROL

As we will discuss later in this book (in Chapters 7 and 10 specifically), working closely with people from diverse backgrounds can be a new and challenging experience for many early childhood practitioners. Diversity can be expressed in many ways, such as through cultural beliefs and traditions, types and variety of life experiences, and socioeconomic challenges. When they are working with family members and other care providers, practitioners who are using coaching are immediately faced with many of these issues, as the need to communicate effectively is critical for every early childhood coach. Being open to coaching relationships with people who are different from oneself is an essential element of becoming an effective coach.

The literature that we reviewed about characteristics of coaches that depict use of family-centered care and effective helpgiving describes the behaviors and traits that a coach should possess. The attitudes and beliefs of a coach are also important. Hanson and Lynch (2010) and Lynch and Hanson (2004) provided insights that early childhood coaches can consider when developing a new partnership. A coach might think about how his or her own beliefs, past experiences, and traditions are different from the coachee. Barrera and Kramer (2009) have written extensively about how to approach and improve interactions with others, particularly when they have different backgrounds and life experiences. Barrera and Kramer refer to their approach as Skilled Dialogue, and their writings contain helpful information and specific strategies for coaches in a variety of challenging situations, particularly when the coach is inexperienced or has difficulty finding success.

Understanding and embracing diversity is a complex challenge for most early childhood coaches. The concept of "choosing relationship over control" (Barrera & Kramer, 2009, p. 51) seems particularly useful from a coaching perspective. Specifically, a coach who chooses to value the relationship with the coachee, rather than controlling the interaction, places an "implicit and explicit focus" on developing mutual understanding, respect, and acknowledgment of the other person's perspective in connection with one's own (Barrera & Kramer, 2009, p. 52): Skilled Dialogue calls for a disposition toward choosing relationship over control . . . 1) as a counterbalance to the tendency to choose control; 2) as a direct expression of another's dignity and worth as equal to one's own; and 3) as a more effective means of establishing truly collaborative partnerships.

The coaching relationship is not about agreeing 100% of the time with the coachee or condoning his or her particular behaviors or actions. Developing a true partnership, however, does require constant reflection on the part of the coach and active consideration of the other person's ideas and viewpoint. The coach may find himself or herself in situations in which it is difficult to remain open to understanding how the coachee views the world, his or her possible options and choices, and his or her responses to the decisions that have been made. When a coach feels uncomfortable or judgmental, seeking to understand the coachee's view will certainly afford extended opportunities for the coaching relationship to grow, unlike what might happen in situations in which a coachee feels that his or her coach does not approve of the choices or decisions he or she has made.

Context is a key feature involved in choosing relationship over control (Barrera & Kramer, 2009). Specifically, the coach should strive to create an interpersonal context in which the knowledge and experiences of the coach are tied to a real person (the coachee) who has real thoughts and feelings and about whom the coach actually cares. When a coach steps outside the context and considers a choice or decision made by the coachee based on what he or she (the coach) would have done or what he or she feels the coachee "should" have done, then the relationship is at risk due to the imbalance created by the hierarchical nature of the coach's thoughts. Instead, when a coach is faced with a lack of understanding he or she should seek to view the situation from the coachee's perspective and gather more information that will support the coach in maintaining an open, honest, and caring perspective.

For example, consider a situation in which a coach has supported a parent in her priority to maintain a budget so that she will be able to keep the electricity on in her apartment. The parent has been making progress for the last several months in achieving her desired outcome. Then the coach receives a phone call from a practitioner at another agency asking if he knew that the family's electricity had been shut off for several days. When faced with this information, the coach has two choices: relationship or control. If the coach chooses control, he may have a plethora of responses, including but not limited to 1) judgment ("I'll bet she spent all her money on beer and cigarettes."), 2) anger ("I can't believe she spent the money on something besides the electricity!"), and/or 3) disappointment ("I'm so disappointed . . . why does she always make such poor decisions?") In this same scenario, if the coach chooses relationship over control, here are a few of the thoughts that might come to mind: 1) "Hmmm . . . I wonder what happened?" 2) "I'd better call to share what I've heard and learn more about what happened," and 3) "This wasn't her plan. I need to learn more about what happened." Each of the thoughts that occur to the coach when he chooses relationship over control depicts a situation in which the coach immediately knows he needs to learn more about what happened in order to support the mother in her current situation. Partnering with people who share opinions, views, and beliefs that contrast with one's own is not easy. It does, however, afford the opportunity for continued learning experiences that further develop a coach's skills and abilities to provide support to a wider range of people with varying priorities. Coaches who choose relationship over control will continue to experience learning opportunities that prepare them to be better at their jobs every day. Recognizing these experiences as valuable and meaningful—even experiences that could never have been imagined or planned for—can help coaches enjoy all of their coaching relationships.

"BIG FIVE" PRACTITIONERS

Personality attributes clearly are an important factor for any early childhood practitioner, but they must be considered critical for practitioners who serve as coaches. Due to the significance of the relationship component in a coach–coachee partnership, practitioners' abilities to self-reflect on the presence or absence of personality traits is instrumental in developing their coaching skills (Passmore, 2008). Considerations of personality dimensions can assist the coach in understanding and preparing to approach certain situations, or deciding what his or her response might be to a challenge. Measures of personality have explored personality traits and an accepted premise exists that all personality attributes are represented in five core areas: 1) conscientiousness, 2) extroversion, 3) agreeableness, 4) openness to experience, and 5) emotional stability (Barrick & Mount, 1991; Goldberg, 1990; Judge, Higgins, Thoresen, & Barrick, 1999; McCrae & Costa, 1987; Morgeson, Reider, & Campion, 2005). McCrae and Costa further noted that it was important for a coach to consider these personality factors, which are referred to in the literature as the "Big Five."

Conscientiousness

A conscientious person is responsible, punctual, well organized, reliable, dependable, predictable, hardworking, and careful and pays attention to detail. In studies of early childhood intervention, this characteristic is repeatedly recognized as a critical trait for practitioners to possess (Bell, 2004; DeGangi, Wietlisbach, Poisson, Stein, & Royeen, 1994; Dinnebeil, Hale, & Rule, 1996, 1999; Dunst, Trivette, & Johanson, 1994; Lowenthal, 1992; O'Connor, 1995; Park & Turnbull, 2003; Soodak & Erwin, 2000). For example, an early childhood coach must understand the importance of and recall many details on a regular basis. Specific details about particular children and complex family situations must be part of a coach's daily working knowledge in order for the coach to support every family to which he or she is assigned.

In addition, individual coaching conversations are usually limited by time. In other words, a specific time is scheduled for the visit to occur. For any coach, planning for meaningful conversations within a set period of time can be challenging, especially in natural settings in which a coach needs to be prepared for just about anything. Also consider the fairly concrete aspect of a coach's role in maintaining a busy and punctual home-visiting schedule. Visits are planned to begin and end at a specific time and to allow adequate time for travel between locations. For example, an Early Head Start home visitor must see families on his or her caseload for 90-minute visits on a weekly basis, at a minimum. It is essential to show up on time for every scheduled visit. Being prepared, organized, and mindful of the topics to be discussed at the home visit are clear ways of demonstrating conscientious behavior so that scheduled conversations and visits do not exceed the planned time for the visit and thus do not negatively affect the timeliness of subsequent visits throughout the day. Of course, situations do arise that impede a coach's ability to arrive on time. In these situations, a conscientious coach will make every effort to contact a family to alert them that he or she may be tardy and to confirm that an altered time of arrival is acceptable.

Extroversion

Extroverts often are described as being sociable, friendly, talkative, outgoing, and warm. The specific term extroversion does not readily surface in studies of early childhood intervention; however, the words warm, caring, friendly, able to engage in informal sharing, comfortable with self-disclosure, and sense of humor do appear frequently across a variety of studies (Dinnebeil et al., 1996; Harrison, Lynch, Rosander, & Borton, 1990; Lowenthal, 1992; O'Connor, 1995). The nature of the work really requires an early childhood coach to be outgoing in new and differing situations and contexts.

Consider an early literacy coach working in a small town. Her roles and responsibilities include working with families from a variety of cultures as well as with teachers in child care settings and local preschools. She also spends time with the local children's librarian for a few hours each month. She has opportunities to meet families of all sizes and configurations. She visits some homes in which the members of the household change frequently and she meets someone new on almost every visit. She also works with interpreters when families do not speak English. The agency for which the early literacy coach works uses an interpreting service from a larger city a few hours away, and they often send different interpreters to support her. It is essential for the coach to be comfortable meeting new people and working in these or similar circumstances in order for her to successfully support the parents and teachers with whom she works. Knowing how to comfortably initiate conversations with new people, being at ease sharing personal experiences as a means for building relationships, and using a sense of humor appropriately when circumstances become intense are all examples of extroversion that benefit an early childhood coach.

Agreeableness

The words curteous, flexible, trusting, generous, selfless, respectful, and acquiescent are often used to describe a person who is agreeable. Being agreeable is an important trait in promoting practitioner–family partnerships according to a variety of studies. The specific terms respectful or demonstrating mutual respect were mentioned in every study reviewed (Bell, 2004; DeGangi et al., 1994; Dinnebeil et al., 1996, 1999; Dunst & Trivette, 2009; Dunst et al., 1994; Harrison et al., 1990; Lowenthal, 1992; O'Connor, 1995; Park & Turnbull, 2003; Soodak & Erwin, 2000).

On a recent visit to a family child care home, a home visitor had an unplanned opportunity to demonstrate his agreeable and flexible demeanor. The child care provider greeted him at the door and invited him inside. Their plan for that day was to take the three children in her care out to the backyard and to discuss safety and the children's interest in exploring outside. When the home visitor walked into the living room, the children were happily playing with toys and looking at books. The television was on (quite loud) and the child care provider immediately sat down on the sofa with her eyes fixed on the television. The early childhood practitioner greeted the children and stated to the child care provider, "Our plan from last time was to go out back today. How would you like to proceed?"
The child care provider replied, "Oh, I forgot. I got so tied up in this news report on CNN. They think they've found those guys that tried to rob that bank. I just love this reporting. It's like you're right there with them. Is it OK if we stay inside? I don't want to miss this. My sister will call me tonight and I don't want her to know more about it than I do."
The home visitor replied, "Sure. Would you like to reschedule our appointment? I know how it is when things come up."
She stated, "No, no . . . I don't want you to go. I can keep my eye on this while we do our stuff. I can show you how I've been reading books to them if you want to see."
As the home visitor thought about his options, he tried to figure out how to conduct a home visit that was different from the one that had been planned and that required the television to be loudly playing in the room. Although he was struggling a bit, he knew that this was what the child care provider and children would be doing if he had not been there. He thought about how he could be courteous and respectful, yet be helpful during the visit.
"OK, that sounds good. First, let me ask, would you be reading books while this news report is on?"
She replied, "Honestly, no. I'd probably wait a bit to catch the details and then get back to the kids."
"OK. What do you think about me just watching what you would be doing if I wasn't here, and then we can talk about ways that you're being responsive to the children, even during times like this, when you need to attend to something that's important to you?"
She quickly stated, "Is that all right with you? It's OK with me."

During the next few minutes while she watched the report on CNN, he observed the children going up to the child care provider and interacting with her: showing her a toy or asking her for a drink. One of the children climbed up beside her on the sofa with a book. In each instance, she responded in a kind, gentle, and responsive way. She even stopped watching the television to read a few pages of the book to the child beside her. The home visitor then shared his observations with her and more discussion ensued.

In this scenario, the home visitor demonstrated an agreeable and adaptable attitude toward trying something completely different from what he had been expecting. He was quite concerned initially that focusing a visit on watching television did not really fall under the realm of good practice in early childhood. Because his priority was to be respectful and courteous regarding the child care provider's request, he reflected on how to make the most of the new situation. He was agreeable to the situation and shifted his priorities to be supportive of the person he was coaching.

Openness to Experience

A person who is open to experience might be described as objective, flexible, adaptable, innovative, independent, someone who prefers variety, open-minded, and imaginative. Being open to experiences is a critical factor for a coach in early childhood intervention who is supporting families, teachers, and other care providers. As early childhood coaches spend most of their time in settings that are different from their own (i.e., families' homes, community settings, preschool teachers' classrooms), demonstrating a flexible "go-with-the-flow" attitude can assist in helping everyone involved to feel comfortable and more relaxed. Flexibility and openness to viewing new experiences as learning opportunities is often mentioned as an effective characteristic of early childhood practitioners (Bell, 2004; DeGangi et al., 1994; Dinnebeil et al., 1996; Dunst & Trivette, 2009; Dunst et al., 1994; Lowenthal, 1992; O'Connor, 1995; Park & Turnbull, 2003; Soodak & Erwin, 2000).

For a coach in an early childhood setting, being open-minded, flexible, and creative are requisite traits. Working with children and their family members and care providers in their natural environments provides endless opportunities for a coach to be innovative and adaptable. A speech-language pathologist (SLP) who was new to home visiting was faced with a surprise on a recent home visit with a family that she had been supporting for a short while. The previous plan for the home visit was to support the family around the noon meal. The SLP came prepared with ideas for assisting the parents and the child to communicate more effectively during their family meal at the kitchen table. When she arrived at the home, she heard the father calling out to her, "Hey . . . we're back here. Come on around!" The SLP followed the voice and saw the father and some of the child's teenage siblings down by the creek at the far end of their property. The father then said, "I hope it's okay, we're playing down at the creek. I know we were going to eat lunch together, but we've been having so much fun catching crawdads that we aren't ready to head to the house. I just came up to the house to get more bacon to use as bait and decided to bring some snacks down to the creek for us to eat."

The SLP replied, "Oh! OK, I've never caught crawdads. Will it be all right to leave my shoes and calendar up here on the porch?"
The father stated, "Sure. Good thing you wore a skirt . . . you won't get your britches wet. Come on! Be careful of the stickers in the yard." He bounded back down to the creek with the rest of the children and the family dog while the SLP placed her shoes and paperwork on a chair on the back porch.

On her way down to the creek, the SLP quickly thought about what she needed to do to be supportive of the family. Although she had planned (and prepared) for a meal in the kitchen with the child in his high chair, she was flexible and open to meeting the family where they were on that day and at the particular time of her scheduled visit. She thought that a snack time by the creek would probably happen, so observing the family as they included the youngest child in having a snack would provide great opportunities for shared communication. She also mused that catching crawdads was jam-packed with opportunities for all kinds of learning, including communication. She readjusted her perspective and hurried down the hill to the creek. As she met the family knee deep in creek water, she said, "Where shall we begin? How can I help?"

This scenario depicts a situation in which an early childhood practitioner, although she had been prepared for another circumstance, was able to shift her plans and be open to a new experience. Her response was adaptable to what was important to the family at the time of her visit. Although she was not prepared or dressed for catching crawdads at the creek, she was able to view the new opportunity with interest and excitement. She was flexible in adjusting her mental plan and demonstrated an open and eager attitude to join the family in an important natural learning opportunity.

CONCLUSION

For a coach to be effective, he or she must have a set of key characteristics or traits that is evident to the coachee. Research also informs early childhood practitioners that using family-centered practices, relational and participatory helpgiving, and skilled dialogue inherently require a coach to possess certain characteristics. The coaching literature describes the "Big Five" personality traits that define a quality coach: conscientiousness; extroversion; agreeableness; open to experience; and emotional stability. Coaches who are competent, open to experiences, adaptable to a variety of situations and circumstances, able to demonstrate a caring, empathetic demeanor, and honest and trustworthy will be effective.

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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
Great book for reviewing
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With the emphasis in Early Intervention now focusing on parent/family member/caregiver coaching rather then sitting and working one on one with a child. This book gives the reader a good definition of coaching and how to practice it. It also gives advice on how to have supervisors train others in coaching via a coaching method. I enjoy what I have read so far and expect I will go to it time and time again in the future.

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Great resource
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This book will be a useful tool to use with supporting teachers and therapists with coaching families, giving them more opportunity to share their thoughts and goals.

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I enjoy the different scenarios and the tips for engaging parents in the sessions.

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[L703.Ebook] PDF Download Tall Building Structures: Analysis and Design, by Bryan Stafford Smith, Alex Coull

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Examines structural aspects of high rise buildings, particularly fundamental approaches to the analysis of the behavior of different forms of building structures including frame, shear wall, tubular, core and outrigger-braced systems. Introductory chapters discuss the forces to which the structure is subjected, design criteria which are of the greatest relevance to tall buildings, and various structural forms which have developed over the years since the first skyscrapers were built at the turn of the century. A major chapter is devoted to the modeling of real structures for both preliminary and final analyses. Considerable attention is devoted to the assessment of the stability of the structure, and the significance of creep and shrinkage is discussed. A final chapter is devoted to the dynamic response of structures subjected to wind and earthquake forces. Includes both accurate computer-based and approximate methods of analysis.

• Sales Rank: #1621238 in Books
• Published on: 1991-01-01
• Ingredients: Example Ingredients
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 9.65" h x 1.30" w x 6.40" l, 2.11 pounds
• Binding: Hardcover
• 537 pages

From the Publisher
Examines structural aspects of high rise buildings, particularly fundamental approaches to the analysis of the behavior of different forms of building structures including frame, shear wall, tubular, core and outrigger-braced systems. Introductory chapters discuss the forces to which the structure is subjected, design criteria which are of the greatest relevance to tall buildings, and various structural forms which have developed over the years since the first skyscrapers were built at the turn of the century. A major chapter is devoted to the modeling of real structures for both preliminary and final analyses. Considerable attention is devoted to the assessment of the stability of the structure, and the significance of creep and shrinkage is discussed. A final chapter is devoted to the dynamic response of structures subjected to wind and earthquake forces. Includes both accurate computer-based and approximate methods of analysis.

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Good book and excellent resource for general knowledge of tall building structures. It is somewhat old and when it comes to the design code it's severely outdated.

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[Z439.Ebook] Download Ebook Yours Tonight (The Reign Series Book 1), by Joya Ryan

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For fans of JC Reed, J Lynn, Jodi Ellen Malpas and Jessica Clare comes an all-consuming, raw and powerful love story that will leave you breathless and wanting more

He will give her everything she's ever wanted . . .

Jack Powell's confidence is matched only by his intensity. The darkness in him comes from years of secrets and memories he'd rather forget. Lana has an exotic innocence that draws him in and Jack wants a taste of her. She's a light in the darkness of his world - and she needs help, which he agrees to.

The only rule? He makes the rules.

Lana gives up her control, letting Jack take her body however he needs, while she works her way into his heart. But Jack's past catches up to them and Lana finds herself wrapped up in a scheme that will expose every secret she's worked so hard to keep. She clung to Jack once when her world was crashing down, but this time, she loves him. She'll continue to reach for him - her only fear is if he'll reach back, or go on his way, taking her soul with him . . .

Addictive and unforgettable, Jack and Lana's story will seduce, surprise and stay with you. A brand new romance by the #1 Bestselling author of Break Me Slowly, this is an emotional roller coaster you'll want to keep riding forever.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

EXCERPT

"You look flushed," he said, his tone so raspy it made me want to tell him why.

"I was just thinking of something," I whispered, my gaze zeroing in on his mouth.

"Oh?" He took one step closer. "Care to share your thoughts?"

I licked my lips . . . ready to share more than just the thoughts. He'd said earlier he wondered what I
tasted like. I was wondering the same about him.

"Is it easy for you? Telling the truth?" I asked.

"Generally."

"How? Not that I lie, but I just don't know how you can say what you say."

"You mean voice what I want?"

"Yes." It was then it hit me. I wanted that. To be able to say what I wanted. Put a voice to my fears. My desires. My everything. To have someone actually listen.

"It's a matter of worth over value," he said. "Any given thing has a value. I just decide what it's worth to me to keep that value."

He took a step forward.

"For example, you have a value. My silence wasn't worth you walking away."

• Sales Rank: #168945 in eBooks
• Published on: 2015-03-05
• Released on: 2015-03-05
• Format: Kindle eBook

About the Author
Joya Ryan is the author of the Shattered series, which includes bestseller Break Me Slowly. She loves to cook and is a terrible dancer, though that doesn t keep her off the dance floor. Currently, she lives in California with her husband and two young sons.

Most helpful customer reviews

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
3.5 - "Give me a number." Stars.
By Miss Claire L. Robinson
3.5 - "Give me a number." Stars.

Joya Ryan has a writing style that entices, her characters are alluring and her story lines are absorbing. I always find myself enjoying her books even more than I thought I would, I won't lie I have high expectations of this author, because she always delivers a beautifully written story.

"I seem to find myself engaged in a game I'm not ready to quit."

Yours Tonight is no exception to the above. Lana is an unusual character in that she is independent yet vulnerable, educated yet inexperienced, her past is something that has up to this point played a very active part in her future and the relationships she has.

"I'm done being afraid."

So when matched with a man like Jack Powell who exudes experience, power, strength and fortitude, you initially think that this woman is going to be totally out of her depth.

"I have never seen a more beautiful curve of a woman in my life."

Jack is carrying a lot of his own baggage around as well, and as their story progresses you realize these are two people trying to not let their pasts define who they are. As they become closer Jack's ghost's and Lana's issues start to play more of a part in the future they are trying to carve out together. Neither are that inclined to share with the other the full truth of what has happened to them, but the moments when they do are pretty heartfelt, but also as the book progresses a little heart breaking especially as the resulting revelations look like they are going to ultimately break them apart.

Joya has managed to weave a little bit of everything into this story to keep the reader on their toes and it certainly shows that in the way things turned out, as I did not see it coming. At all. I loved Jack and his intensity, the guy knows what he wants, and goes after it, but his sensitivity towards Lana where it mattered gave me the warm fuzzies. I liked Lana, but now I want to see her develop into the strong, confident woman that Joya is so accomplished in writing as the series proceeds, I can see the embers glowing in her spirit, I want them to now build up into a solid, true flame.

The only thing I did question was the speed in which Lana manages to get over things that you believe are initially going to give her pause in regards to her relationship with a man in general, it didn't really detract from my enjoyment of the story, but I would have liked a little more exploration and time taken with it at the beginning, it felt like initially the route taken may not be as plain sailing as a normal couple would take, but then it was never really explored further. This is however the beginning of a series so it may be explored further as the books progress.

"I just wanted to be strong on my own."

This book ends on a bit of a cliffy, but also offers a little glimpse into the direction in which Lana's life could potentially go in the second book in the Reign Series. Again, I have absolutely no idea how Joya plans to continue Lana's journey, and that makes me eager to read more of it.

"I always have time for my priorities."

ARC generously provided by the author, and it was my pleasure to provide the above honest review.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
So...I'm kind of in love with this series :)
By Sheri @ Tangled Up In Books
Originally posted on my blog: Tangled Up In Books

I received a copy of this book, from InkSlinger PR, in exchange for an honest review. In no way did this sway either my review or my rating!

I am consumed. I am ruined. I am...everything. So far this year I have already read some truly amazing books that swept me away leaving me happy and contented and thinking there was no way I could feel anything better. Yet with finishing Yours Tonight the only thing running through my head right now is how in the world am I going to survive until book two comes out next month? That's only one month and I'm a wreck. And then after that there will be one more month again for the last one?? When I stopped reading for dinner earlier, actually it was more like I had to force myself to stop, I mean if I wasn't a mother I probably would have forgone food and kept going until I was finished, but it was complete torture to stop. And that was only for like one freaking hour!! Sigh. I mean I realize that this isn't exactly long to wait for books and usually we're worried about waiting sometimes a year or so but all I can say is... I. Am. Consumed.

It's funny because when I was just a tad over halfway through with this book and I had all of these feelings, I ended up writing half of a review and I hadn't even finished reading yet. The only thing left of all that now is the above paragraph. Not because my thoughts on those things I had typed out have changed since then, I still feel all of them. It's just from that point in time when I wrote them to now at the end of the book...well, I'm feeling a bit shattered. Those things just felt sort of insignificant in light of that very emotional end. Well emotional up to the epilogue. That filled me with much needed and appreciated laughter and a huge grin.

The characters in this book have these tragic, haunting pasts that they're all trying to forget and escape from. Lana's story is something you learn right off the bat and even though I had my suspicions about what troubled Jack, his past is only hinted at through most of the book. Both of them tragic in their own ways that I felt deeply. It's more noticeable with Jack, how much his past affects him. With him it's this need for control and this sureness that there's a darkness within him. With Lana there were so many different things but really it all came down to the fact that she was this fragile shell that wasn't truly living until she meets Jack.

It was amazing to watch Lana go from before Jack, to the Lana she was desperately trying to hold on to by the end of the book. Watching the way he brought her to life and gave her strength and confidence. I loved her character's growth. I just adored her character period. She's so adorable and awkward. She's like this ball of contradictions switching from one extreme to the next. Like she'd be outspoken and blurt out whatever was on her mind one moment and then in the next breath the shyness and self-consciousness would take hold and she'd clam up. She's definitely become one of my most favorite characters. And I'm not just speaking about in this book or series.

There's this amazing connection between Jack and Lana and I loved watching it unfold and deepen. Oh holy crap on a cracker! The passion? The heat? The intensity? It was so off the charts it was almost tangible. I could swear there were times that I almost felt like, if I tried hard enough, I would be able to reach out and feel those sparks and that heat coming off of them. It was beautiful and bittersweet to watch.

To say this book took me completely by surprise would be an understatement. I had a feeling that I would like it, like it a lot even. I've read a couple of Joya Ryan's other books and I love her writing style but most especially the characters she creates. So I never had any doubts about liking it. I just never realized the depths of my feelings after I finished! I've already pre-ordered a finished copy, since I'm writing this a few days before release, plus I've pre-ordered the next book, Yours Completely, and I would have gone as far as pre-ordering Yours Forever had it been available on Amazon already. See? I know I've said it before twice already but I feel like it needs repeating. I. Am. Consumed.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
HOT as HELL !!
By Kim
When I started this book I was told it was an emotional roller coaster but they let out gripping, grueling, fantastic and HOT as HELL !!

Everyone has a past that we try to forget and never speak of whether is it a good memory or bad...but when the bad ones come back to haunt you, you never know how you will react. When Lana Case sees her past in a bar does she run, cry or does a wall of a man hide her from her past. Jack Powell sees a situation that has him coming to Lana's side to shield her something that he has co clue what it is but her expressions, body language and the fear on her face that she might need a friend at that moment. But little did they both know was that they both had pasts that would help them become one, as friends, as workers and then as lovers.

But will Jack be able to tell Lana his skeletons in his closet, will Lana be able to tell Jack who is the person she fears most and will Call and Harper be able to put them together again or will work and fears tear them apart for good.

This is the beginning of another awesome sex and hot series for Joya !! I can't wait for the next chapter in these character lives and can time bring peace and comfort and LOVE to them ALL ...... Hanging on by a thread waiting !!

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[F977.Ebook] PDF Download Good Citizenship in America, by David M. Ricci

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In order to describe an American civic ideal for those who enjoy membership in the state and the obligations entailed, this study traces its development in American history. Starting from the republicanism of pre-1865, the book follows the widening of the franchise following post-1865 economic development. It characterizes the twentieth century by the increase and subsequent decline of consumerism, and by the development, in later years, of the "economic conscience". The volume's analysis of civic trends in America highlights many of the inherent ideals of American life.

• Sales Rank: #7876691 in Books
• Brand: Brand: Cambridge University Press
• Published on: 2004-07-19
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 8.98" h x .79" w x 5.98" l, .95 pounds
• Binding: Paperback
• 320 pages

Features

• Used Book in Good Condition

Review
"[David Ricci] often brings some interesting discussion and useful distinctions for concepts[...]Ricci's original approach clearly links citizenship studies with early American history[...]this book will be useful for undergraduate students in these two disciplines."
-Yves Laberge, Political Studies Review

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